Lines and circles we all use them and have them in our daily lives whether we realise it or not. Example, lines on the road, shows us which lane to stay in, personal lines we draw which we know as boundaries, similar to fences we build in a line to keep things in or out depending on the place we have erected the fence. Some lines in our lives we make clearer than others. While other lines seem to have a certain amount of elasticity built-in them, like a ping back effect, but what actually happens when this elastic stops being as flexible as it once was? The answer is simple Like a bad bungee cord, the line snaps, snapping in mid-air leaving us to plummet head first into a pile of rocks below. Meanwhile we have confused our lines with circles, the circle of concern, the circle of influence the circle of ongoing rhetorical shit we can’t seem to break away from, the circle of routine. Defining circles as being a be all and end all to how we look at life and how we allow things to affect us. This has to be the biggest load of over philosophised shit I have come across. My god, it’s not that hard to go back to simple, realistic and to action these words that shrinks continue to use as modules for us to base the way we process thoughts or the way we react to situations that we as humans are put in. My god we are like all animals, when scared or feeling threatened we normally bite. How hard is that concept? I am sure that the lions in their prides don’t live their lives on circles of influence and of concern. No they do not, they live simply, they live to survive, coming down to survival of the fittest, meanwhile thinning out their packs as they move from place to place on the hunt to stay alive. There is no fucking phycology in this. It is the chain of command, this chain that is one they all know to respect, and why? Without this simple chain of command the lions would not stand a chance against other hunters within their worlds. But humans, holy fucking hell we complicate things so much, with the bullshit that comes back to keeping things simple. We define our actions or reactions with some fucked up excuse for how we think and why we think with this thought process. We have disorders for every human action or thought process possibly known to mankind these disorders have some kind of mother creator being a genetic disorder and we continue to name our actions our reactions and the inevitable consequences by giving a name to why we have acted in any way shape or form resulting in this consequence in the first place. How much more fucking complicated can we possibly make life? There is still a very misguided stigma attached to people who genuinely suffer from mental illnesses across the world. A common yet detrimental Misconception which has been fabricated by the try hard Einstein’s and theories of these peas whack job scientists of the world attempting to reason with why or how a person becomes mentally ill to begin with. People still seem to believe that mental illness is contagious, by talking to a person who suffers from bi polar disorder then they will catch it like a flu. Therefore isolating and suffers into silence, for fear of becoming out casted in their work place school or their group. People who suffer mental illnesses and or disorders are often silenced fearing the reaction of others or the way others will treat them if they know that the person has a mental illness the fear of what others will think of them or how others will turn this person into some kind of freak show. The fear of not fitting into the boxes we have made in society and labelled as normal, or socially acceptable. Meanwhile the person who is affected continues on a circle of self-hate, diminishing self-worth and very little to no will to be on the face of this earth as they suffer in silence, for fear of how others will react. To me in my mind this has to be one of the cruellest things a human is capable of, to make another feel like they are so low that they are not the same, to ridicule to mock and to sit back and fucking judge when the head persecutor is probably a royal head case themselves. Which brings me back to lines, the lines that we have drawn and use to define the norm within society, the lines we have allowed to hold us into and conform to what is normal, and the lines that are inevitably the prison of people who are somehow not the same as the majority of society, weather or not it is due to mental health issues, a physical disability, possibly a learning disability a birth defect or simply because they choose not to go with the flow of humans being the judge jury and executioner’s to a person who stands out of their community. We are not born with knowledge, we are born clean and similar to a sponge, we learn what we are taught, and we rely wholly and solely of those around us to keep us alive. Not one of us asks for the gift they call life, and I am sure as shit not one of us asks to be the odd one out, to feel isolated, alone and live in their own silent prisons. Far be it for me to mock society overall, I mean shit, society is the very thing that has created laws, governments, advocates, and so-called world leaders, society has laid the foundation of what we will believe in, and how we will believe in it, and society is the majority of how the overall community that we all live in will work, or will not work, whichever the case may be. Far be it for me to judge the fuckedupness of how so many people think, or far be it from me to decide what fucked up is. However in retrospect I do find those who judge another due to his or her choices in beliefs, or culture, their colour, or their choice of living with their partner same-sex or opposite, to choose not to become man and wife in the eyes of some so-called god and label this a sin, certainly falls into what I class as fucked up. It further falls into my views of fucked up when somebody with no knowledge or very little knowledge of mental illness, blames it on drugs or any other substance abuse issue, or blames mental illness on the person suffering from this dibilating illness on being either genetic or lazy. So on goes the circles of life we have created, and within these circles are the lines in which we follow, however at what point will we the human being realise that we are making the rod for our own backs even stronger, as we float down the river of denial. When will we ever fucking learn?
I am clumsy at times not known for my tact and or grace, straight to the point, and somewhat impatient, I have come to accept that what is in this life simply is.
Far from religious, I do not believe in a divine god per say that will come down and save the world, although I accept each to their own when it comes to their views and beliefs of what religion is or should be.
I consider myself to be my own worst critic as I tend to strive for best, and have a tendency to push myself physically and emotionally beyond my limits.
Still naive at times, still hoping to see the good rather than the bad in people, this has not been one of the qualities that I can say I am fond of, as it has come to burn me time after time over the years.
I am a strong believer in Karma, as I do believe in what we put out is what we do get in return, good bad or indifferent.
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